Air underneath

I open my door once more

So you can have a look inside

To see what I manifest

With my dreams

I keep that door cracked

Letting out what’s coming in

Welcoming once more

What I bring forth

Sometimes it’s good

Sometimes it’s bad

Either way I learn

What I’m supposed to

I take it in stride

I do it with pride

And always with love

When it’s returned

I know I I’ve done well

I know my token was taken

once more

how was it received

with ease or with redemption

of a consumption

is it forthcoming

the devil within

I know it

I take it

I feel it

I make it

I see others watching

waiting and debating

to keep on looking

am I crazy or am I for real

is it suspect I know how she feels

What do I get

for baring my skin

sometimes I get roses

sometimes I get spit

sometimes I get more questions

sometimes it’s inspiration

however will I tell my story

when it’s filled with a territory

of ubiquitous sin

of slime and grim

even when it was pretty

it was a little bit sloppy

I could hardly bare to look

for fear of being spooked

I do not know all

engulfed in withdrawal

Eating through all my sanity

filling up with blue fins

I see them within

they glimmer and they shine

makes them hard to pass by

I see more checkered floors

more than ever before

the deceit comes in scores

drenched with anonymous blood

tell me who are you now

it’s not who you were then

where we stand in

Falling in through the seams

in a sea of depression

full of oppression

I hear it before me

Even if you sound like a dumbass 

Saying over and over again

I do not answer questions without a lawyer present 

Isn’t that better than going to jail for an infraction 

That’s hurting No One

We’re all so caught up on the what if’s

Providing a ticket to what’s within

We have to learn from our mistakes

Yes that’s our journey

But to decide what to tell the masses 

What’s judgement

That’s not up to us

The only one who can judge is the All knowing

Everything else

Is just for controlling you 

#calixtosgarden #plantingseeds

Published by Nathalie Ramirez

My love for humanity, and for the planet, has set me on a path of healing through love, compassion, and understanding. I'm originally from a big city in the big state of Texas, making my personality quite large. I then landed in a small town that's out-of-puzzles gorgeous where people still wave at each other when coming across each other in the street. This transition has helped my development and tried relationships with distance and sacrifice. I have 2 beautiful boys, Silas and Declan, and their loving father, Curtis, who make my world go round. My political views all stem from wanting to protect this beauty in all its forms.

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